To My Mother

To my mother


tonight I dress my body

in soft and silvery silk

it decorates my latest disappointments

flooding cloth around my wrists and thighs

i gently brush through my hair

as if I was my own daughter

sitting on my lap after a hot bath on a long day

placing little drops of cream on her baby soft skin

moisturizing her red cheeks

as I nourish her soul with kind and livingwords

and as I softly stroke the bear skin on my hips,

and tell myself sweet bedtime stories

i wonder


do I not spend every second being this gentle to myself?

oh, if I could just always see myself

like my mother sees her child

could always see my body being valid to take up space

could always see my soul as too precious to collapse

oh, I want to crawl into the unshattered safety,

a mother’s mouth can create so effortlessly

and hide in its depths from my

violent hands and mind

mom, can I please borrow your view for a little while longer,

just so that I can see myself

with eyes

so forgiving,

so patient,

so kind.